Some
of my thoughts on the mediation process and
outcome:
I am much more comfortable with the outcome
than I ever expected to be. There were times
that I was ready to concede an argument for
the sake of reaching a conclusion, knowing
that I would resent my partner for taking
advantage of me. But you continued to
look for alternatives and compromises that
were acceptable to both of us. I think
that the success of the process was in part
due to the fact that neither my partner nor I
felt threatened by what you were doing – you
dealt with facts and clarifications of
intentions. This allowed both of us to feel
that our interests and needs were being
considered and protected.
I felt that your systematic approach kept us
on track and avoided emotionally charged
situations. I did not know what to expect from
the process, and at times felt frustrated that
we did not jump right to what I considered
“the real issues.” But I came to
realize that going through the steps of the
process was critical for the ultimate success.
I am so relieved that we avoided a battle in
court. I have no doubt that that would have
been a financial disaster for us, and worse,
would have resulted in years of anger,
resentment and pain for my daughter, my
partner and myself. I feel that I have had to
bend, but in ways that were not as difficult
as I expected. And I feel very ready to start
the next phase of the dissolution of this
relationship, with a clear mind and
conscience. Thanks for making this all
happen – I haven’t been to
any other mediators, but to enough
counselors and other professionals to
appreciate how good you are at what you do.
Kathryn
Carl,
I just wanted to thank you again for the
invaluable help you provided to B____ and me.
Even though we didn’t “do” our
marriage very well, we did manage to handle
our divorce – with your help – in a way
that we can be proud of. There was minimal
rancor and everything we did was directed
toward a peaceful, just settlement. As I said
to one of my friends, you not only helped us
with the disposition of our stuff, but also
with our “stuff” – the emotional baggage
that needed to be jettisoned.
I came through this process feeling better
about myself and about my husband than when we
began. I never would have thought it possible
that we did so much valuable work in so short
a time. You will long be remembered for
helping us take care of ourselves and our
child – today, tomorrow, and for all of the
tomorrows that we shall live.
A.
Mitchell
I have the highest respect for your skills as
a professional mediator. Your gentle,
intuitive assistance with the difficult
process of dissolving my 27 year marriage was
invaluable. You listened to and respected my
thoughts and feelings... I felt as if I was
held in a very supportive, protected space
while being guided through my life changing
transition.
Jacqueline
Audrey Martin
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